Mood: just tired

well last night was good and bad. The Barenaked Ladies just rocked. They proved they are one of the best show bands ever! They played most of my favourites...(no Good Boy or Break Your Heart...but they did play Brian Wilson. I swore they weren't going to play it. but it was the last song before the encores...We(Elana and Myself) had really good seats....3 level off the floor dead centre. I can't really describe what they are like concert...they jump around like morons(in the good way)...Lights flash like mad(high intencity LEDs hurt) But it was so good...they did most of the new stuff and alot of the old stuff. Anyway, I hate riding transit but it's way easier than driving out there and paying 14 bucks for parking...the way there wasn't too bad, but the way back we had to keep back tracking to the same station again and again...it was sad....it's late and I've had a long day...so I'll keep it short and finish up when I have some time...

Song of Day: the BNL's Brian Wilson...one of their best songs hands down...really wordy, but it is so well written...

ok, until I get the time to finish this...

-Cleric

Ps-i don't like using drafts on this, if I write it, I want you to see it

Hey

Sorry I haven't been ranting very much. Not like anyone cares...no one ever reads this...if they do I'm fscked...anyway, this is just to start something that I can finish tomorrow after evening rehersal. I was at Seafast on Friday and Saturday...On Thurday it was a Half day rehearsal...not really a half day, I spent it all at school...

ok, I'll finish up tomorrow...I promise..I have a lot to talk about...

Now it is tomorrow-March 5th

I slept in until about 11 today...doesn't really affect me, I had 2 spares with no early, so I didn't miss any class. I'm so pumped for Hamlet in English. I loved Macbeth (SHHHH....can't say the M word in a theatre) It was so bloody and so guilt ridden...my kind of story. Hamlet is suppose to be similar. History is pretty much the same, can't complain...My parents has parent teacher interviews last week...Barber is concerned about my sleep patterns, Charette is "disapointed" and Dennett says he sees me more than my parents do...it's true. I spend alot of time in the theatre...i really wished they would of let me sleep there during seafast...that would have been great. Seafast was great. Not as many people as last year, but we had everything about 20 times more organzied than last year...it's good to know when you fail once, it's hard to do the same thing again. I MCd and I was pretty good....We had like 10 staff and almost no teacher support...but we put on an event for about 100 people....I think it went well....Thank you Katie and Andrea, you are Godesses! without you two we would have been running around like chickens with our heads cut off... But the Improv team got ripped to shreads....it was a combinations of things...bad crowd, poor planning(even though I walked them through each events many times over an hour!) and maybe I should realize that I'm not dealing with the cream of the acting crop as I did last year. As actors these guys aren't very good...as improvers....not better...but I hope I can change them, mold them, train them to be better...or not...I don't know. I can only pull them along so far then they have to do something...Well Anthony has just informed me that he has been the one egging Lisa on in her fight to "win" me...what I wouldn't give for a M3 and some time...I hope for god sakes he can turn her off....or I'm going to have to do it and it's not my style to put someone down. Saint was right....we should have bust some caps in ol Bessie before she got out of hand....God I wish Saint was here to talk about this....but NOOOO, she's going to Alberta to lead her own scam team....yay! and she's trying to get into an art school that doesn't require high school grad...doesn't that seem wrong to you? SCAM...maybe I'm being paranoid...maybe I care for Saint and her well being....maybe i just don't trust anybody..so many people have hurt me and I have learned to shug it off and keep going...hey, it's what kept me alive for 5 years...well almost alive(damn grade 10) Well as we speak Anthony is putting down Lisa...as gently as you can put down a girl that size....ouch...mean...hey, this is the only place I can get things like this out...Anyway...I think Lisa has offically given up on me....YAY...break out the champange....time to party!!! ok, party over....I might be getting a grad ring...that's pretty cool...Canadian Flag on one side...acting masks on the other...nice huh? I think high school acting will stick with me for a while. It changed the way I deal with the world. It gave me a sense of belonging and family within highschool. it's cool...I'm getting one of the cheaper ones anyway...no big bling for me...just a simple ring...(it's still like 300...) hey, my parents want to spend the money...who am I to say no? I'm finally starting to like(ok put up with) high school...so I want to remember it...rehearsals have been going well, this play is going to  rock the block...It is getting down to crunch time... Ok, enough about school....Miller came over yesterday and we played some Rainbow 6III. Sweet game..Oh, Pyro sucks at Halo....it was a 2 on 1...Pyro and Cleric vs Miller....yeah. Pyro ran around like a moron and got killed at every step....Miller brought out the tank Pyro would run into the treads...thanks..a55hole..but hey, it was fun....good clean violent fun...TANGO DOWN!!! I feel really bad for Elana...I think she hates me after the BNL concert...I haven't seen her since....I felt like and idiot...I can't navagate transit and I shouldn't of gone with gut instinct....It worked...but it worked after a long time....I still don't think she likes me that much...but it does't matter, she was just someone who liked the BNL and could make it that night...I was there for the music!!! Seriously....But I mean she was sick that day and just came out to see the concert, so I shouldn't feel so bad for myself...it's not like she has come out and said that she hates me. We're friends...nuff said..more like speaking aquantences...it's cool...who else can you have a conversation about Pussy Snorkles with?

Ok, I'm done...

Song of the Day:  Nickleback's "Figure you Out" it rocks...they play it at the Junos...
and I do like the pants around her feet....and the ways she says "please when she looks up at me....damn!

 -Cleric

Mood: Feeling fat and like crap!

Well today was a very uneventful day...It being a day off and all,
Pyro and I decided to go see "Hellboy" It wasn't that bad...but then it
wasn't that good, I still liked it.  Selma Blair shooting fire is
almost better than her making out with Sarah Michelle Gellar in "Cruel
Intentions"...what? It was a good movie too. Ron Pearlman is funny as
hell...He always is. but I realized something about "Hellboy"...the
Nazis and Rasputin came back...sure that's all good...but they had no
real goal besides unleashing evil  things upon the world...maybe
it was just me...or was it something to do with the "Demon-Eden" they
talked about in the end. I didn't really pay attention through the
beginning...I really wanted to see it with Saint, but i don't feel like
calling her up, I feel that I'd be intruding in to her life and that
she really isn't my friend anymore. That scares me. I  was talking
with my mom one afternoon and I brought this up, I said that Saint
abandoned me...but then my mom responded my saying, no I abandoned
her...That cut really deep...I don't think she meant it like that, but
just as a comment to get me thinking...Boy did it. The last 3 times
I've phoned she's been doing something. work, party, whatever...maybe
because she is no longer in school, she has no need for me. She once
told me not to use the word "Drop-out"(what? Long term unexcused
absence sounds better?!) I told her I wouldn't to make it seem like a
guilt thing....I think it worked and scared her away...I really should
phone her when I get some more time...like May 9th....Dennett issued
the "Long Haul" Schedule on Thursday..some rehearsals are morning,
lunch, afterschool, evening...some are from 2:35 until 8 O' clock...Six
hour runs....with Graeme working after school shifts, I'm to be getting
a lot of bear action. But that's ok...one of the rehearsals it going to
be with the "Bear Crew" trying to get the fscking thing to work right.
I'm preping the "Bear Survivial kit" this weekend....shortsleeve shirt,
Dry-Weave shorts and a "Camel Pack" with extra mouth pieces...ah, the
ways I suffer for my art..if  you can call it that...it's just a
hobby. I could never see myself persuing it as a career. Speaking of
being paid...remind me never ever, ever ,ever, ever offer to help
people again....a month ago I offered Bender and her Harmony Thearte
group my skills as a Freelance Improver...well I found out later that:
Number
1-The Harmony Thearte's main purpose is to teach anti racist values
through stark, and uncensored performences...WHAT THE FSCK!??!! We were
going to ND!!!! We all thought we'd be shot and jumped in the parking
lot after...now I know why some people dropped out(I should of followed
Michelle's lead, she is after all the smart one)
Number 2-No one can
organize...we had to bus down there...that's just stupid...not that I
have anything against the local transit system, but everyone could get
rides and no one organized them and then I completely missed english
because some of the memebers decided to try to pass themselves off as
ND students for half an hour...we performed for twenty mintutes and I
still didn't get back on time!!! Remind me never to let anyone younger
than me organize unless they have proved themselves....
Number 3-The
entire fscking format is fsking crap. Bender said all these things
about "joking"... it's like their term for almost MCing...she said she
received training in joking....what training is needed?! Holy shit...a
monkey could have done it! The monkey would be better(Go that way Red
Monkey!-Hellboy quote....so good!) The format is also complete
dependent on audience participation....whoa now...that's hard when only
20 lazy people show up!!!!!!! I mean it wouldn't teach shit to
anyone!!! Not a soul!! Except for one guy, I think he got it...and
maybe he taught something to everyone else too
Number 4-this one
pisses me off the most...THEY ARE GETTING PAID FOR THIS....PAID?! FOR
THIS?! Apparntly the way Bender got everyone in the first place by
saying "Hey anyone need some quick money?"Come on..they are
teenagers...who would say NO?! Then, they sign a legal binding
contract, and then they get paid $100 for 8 shows...WHAT?! It was the
biggest crapfest I have ever seen!!!!! I wouldn't pay ANYONE to do this
shit....I can see someone doing this out of the goodness of their heart
for the sake of acting (Like Angela and myself) but getting paid? So to
the people who started Harmony Theatre...I know you are out there...you
cannot hide from me....There is a higher power controlling this....you
are mine!!! YOU HEAR ME?! For the format alone you should all be
dragged out into the street, beaten with clubs and shot!!!Ok...maybe
that was too strong...but seriously...I bet you all began with good
intentions and maybe this worked in the past...but not now...with a
bunch of quarter decent actors...Well they aren't all that bad...Lauren
is good....but everyone needs to get their chops...I have to say that
considereing pretty much the entire improv team is in
Harmony....speaking of Improv....Everyone is now against Anthony...even
Dennett! All the members say they want me to lead them next year, and
they need to get rid of Anthony....meaning, I need to tell him that we
no longer want him..and he was worried about me overthrowing him...well
he was right! It's not like I don't respect him...without him I would
have never found the acting program...but sometimes I think he doesn't
understand how to lead or deal with teenagers...I have learned to
become a good leader...so I think it'll be good...I don't think I
should tell anyone that I want Anthony around to handle all the
administraion stuff I don't want to do. I really feel bad for
overthrowing him...but is it really my fault? Oh the trip the Law
Courts on Tuesday was awesome..I've been bitten by the big city. Omar,
Sahota and I spent our lunch break out in a Starbucks just watching
chicks pass...and it was a great view! We all were wearing dress
clothes( I love my suit!) and it was really nice for people to
stare...Mr. Haber  made a big fuss about me wearing a suit...I
said either go all the way or don't go at all....I can't just wear a
tie and a shirt...I can't just wear a jacket and dresspants...so I have
to go with the whole package...Haber said "ok now, everyone must call
him "My Lord" now because he looks so judge like"...yeah...I feel so
much better..but hey...Raybans and a suit make me look really
good..even if I felt fat...Dad said he'd be testifying that day...he's
a firecode inspector...does it all the time...I actually met him
outside the courthouse just as I got there...he said he'd be in room
204..so after all the opening and such we all went to 204...well, I
found out after they had canceled it because no Justices of the peace
showed up...so I was treated to traffic court....which wasn't that
bad...it is so funny to see people try to defend themselves for half an
hour not to pay a $75 fine, but then get it in the end. Some guy
tried to defend himself for running a red....I thought it would be a
case dealing with short yellow lights....well this guy went on forever
about the left hand turn signal....and he was in the centre lane...the
judge was like WTF...the Crown was like WTF...I was like WTF....if
you're in the centre lane the left turn signal has NO BEARING on you!
Anyway..I thought that was funny.  We saw a ME (Medical Examiner)
testify....it was so interesting...he talked about all the ins and outs
of Foresic science. I could have listened to this guy for hours...I
could keep up with the jargin...but even the judge had to stop him and
tell him to speak english...It was so cool....the man was a credit to
his profession...other than that it was pretty boring...a civil
case....Damn accounting...and the Air India trial...Whoa...boring as
hell...but it was fun getting searched  by Sheriffs and
stuff...After the whole trip, the three of us went to the closest
Future Shop...Omar wanted to pick up Matrix Revolutions...anyway..I
have decided to get an Ipod! I need an Mp3 player, so I said go big!!!
15gb of sweetness...it's bigger than my harddrive! 3,700 songs! all the
CD's I've made (over 24) equal about 440....this is going to be so
cool...Anyway...MuffinHead is getting on my nerves...My spanish class
of 15 people is pretty much made of people in my law class, so we were
all gone on Tuesday...she promised us it would be a slacker block and
we'd have nothing to really catch up on...well I was wrong...Now we all
have to come in this Tuesday to make it up!!! I don;t have the time to
make up classes!...Apparently that day we did about twice the normal
ammount of work we usually do....I even went to her the day before to
ask what we were going to do! She said she hadn't written a lesson
plan....(sigh) so I'm going in the morning because it's just Family
scence rehearsals...My parents saw her at parent teacher
interviews....after a five mintue interview, my parents came home and
the first words out of my mom's mouth when I asked her how it went were
"What a Bitch!" Muffinhead came off really rude and kept asking my dad
if he spoke Japanese....he was the 2nd generation born here...so the
answer is NO!!! my mom thought I was overexagerating....nope...I'm glad
they had a glimpse into the supreme evil...The Buffy Musical is going
well...we had to cut two numbers and now we are beginning to polish the
remaining 3...I was proud last rehearsal...it worked out well..Well I
finally told someone about this site(Being a Canadian on  UK
server makes it hard to adveritise...)....Brittany R....yay! She's a
good kid...dedicated to the acting program...it's good to see that
these days...Finally, a decent grade 9...never thought i'd ever see
that! Well there are a lot, especially around the acting program. Most
have minor rolls and are in the ensemble...but
they are good people to talk to...I feel so bad because I don't know
all of their names...and because I'm a lead, everyone knows mine....I
feel really bad...but I'm working on
it....Brittany...Megan...Erin...Kelsi...Rachael...Sarah...I think
they'd be proud...so now I have a gang of grade 9 girls following me
around(well not really) it's cool! I haven't run or gone to the gym in
about a week...so I feel like crap...I should go really soon because I
have the 10k SunRun next week....and  the only physical actvity
I've done is open a bag of chips...well it's not that bad...I did walk
through downtown vancouver....but then to Burger King and
Starbucks...(sigh) I'll get back to it..no problem...I can use my
spares....
Ok, I'm done...let's see if this "Currently Playing" thing works.....so the song will be there I guess...
Website of the week: 
I want to put Brittany's in here...but I can't remember the URL off the
top of my head...so um..when I find it, I'll add it....I feel so
dumb...1:10am..found it! www.freewebs.com/xxclarity yay!

Thanks
-Cleric

Mood: Still fat...still feeling like crap...

well I'm at my aunts house right now...she finally got hi-speed internet so Pryo and I are using that to out advantage...the Canucks/Flames game is on right now and I really should go watch it...but I'm ont...I'm blogging...I really like this...it is a release for me... I went to Simon Fraiser this afternoon for a quick walk around...it is a really nice campus (not as nice as UBC mind you, but UBC doesn't offer a crim course so there...) Just the pool and the gym are worth going for...I'm not worried about  getting in to SFU, once I'm in Kwantlen, I'll do fine, but getting out of high school and into college is the hard part...they took second terms marks  for acceptence...Second term was the worse so far.. and getting a C in Psych AP and then trying to get in Crim? Yeah that's hard...but I hope they look at the final term because I'm going to kick it's ass like no ones business!!! I feel so much better about bender now....I'm glad i told her off...but I'm tempted to add some fuel to the fire and send an email telling her i did like her to begin with(but not in that way) but then something turned me off...like all the other people she ever knew...that's why her boyfriends cheated on her...that's why another isn't comming back from Minasota...yeah...I know that would be really mean but it would cool...Brittany says I do have evil potential (as long as I don't kick puppies....I don't...) I might begin to explore the the darker  side of me....ooooo...darkness...it's side I liked to explore more...be a little more cunning, a little more sinister...i think it would be a great change...My aunt has a wicked flatscreen and  a better mouse...I'm joking around with Pyro saying that she's on her way to building a very nice gamming rig...yeah, thats not her style..this thing is a pure work horse meant for long hours of accounting and spreadsheets and the like...I'm picking up an optical mouse tomorrow...I'm tired of picking the shit out of trackballs and having them jam on me when I'm sniping or running in game...maybe a new keyboard...we've gone through 3...Pyro eats at the comp and it's covered in Pizza stains and orange pop...it's no longer computer gray, but kind of an off orange  colour...well I have to go....the parental units are leaving the coop and I need to catch up....I'll finish up at home...the time is 18:56...oh...just to note, the song of the day is John Mayer's Clarity...Brittany's website reminded me of it....Ok, it's now about 21:56...I just got home...apparently I didn't need to get off..Pyro is a dick..like really....he is a such a dick i cannot begin to describe how much of a dick he is...But he is my brother and  as they say you can't choose your family...but you can beat the crap out of them...He kicked me off again! it's now 23:18...this is the most times I have ever written a blog entry...it's stupid...once I get my laptop life will be alot easier..and my Ipod....I'm getting it so it can act more as an external harddrive then an Mp3 player....but an Mp3 player isn't a bad thing....(sigh/ugh) what was that....it was a burp and a sigh all at once....too much easter chocolate...I need to get fit again or die trying...I've done it before being fatter and this is no different! I bet I can do it in a few months...I have to get fit before grad...or the tux won't fit! so let's work this out.....Eots ends May 8th....Grade is July 2nd so I will about 2 months to run it off....if I add afterschool runs...Fblk spares and actual regular weight training sessions I can do it! It's not hard...oh yeah...clean up the diet.....EAT BREAKFAST FOR ONCE and keep the house free of junk food....get back to the Cafe soup and drink like a fish...water that is...wow, that was a nice little pep talk...I really needed that...I worked hard to get fit and it's dissapeared in 2 months. I think I can get it back.....I just need the time..acting really cuts into that and I'm not much of a mulit-tasker...that's something else I need to learn...to be able to get up in the morning, run, get breakfast, get changed...get to school....do homework...get a job...weight train...then run again...then have, heaven forbid...a SOCIAL LIFE! (GASP!) Yeah this one is pretty short..I got most of it out yesterday....and the day before...
but hey...weapon of the weak!
After years of research, reading, testing I have finally choosen my favourite pistol in the whole wide world...
THE SIG P228! Known as the M11 in the military. It is a compact version of the SEALS P226. It is 770g, 180mm long and has a 13 round mag (9mm)...but it can fit the P226 15/20 mags too..it is heavier than the glocks...but I like it because it has a De-cocking lever, no manual safety, and the added weight makes it a good weapon to pistol whip someone with... the polymer glock would break...(no...not really...but I like the Sig as a compact 9mm pistol...glocks are ok....21C is a good one....45auto...)

 Mood: Doing ok

Wow, it's has been a while since I've blogged, so let's get to work

For the past month I have been stressed out beyond
belief....Rehearsals, Test, Assignments, Paragraphs, Essays, Finals,
and Personal Problems....yes events so big and stressful they deserve
capitals....I had to back down from the AP exam. I felt kind of bad,
but I hadn't registered, it the monday after the final night of the
play and I have no time to study...plus it costs like $125 to take and
I don't have that kind of money to spare. So that's one stressor
down...Graeme has been sick as shit for weeks now. I'm working both
casts rehearsals...it's hard work being the bear for two days in a
row...I've even had to do the publicity stunts for ir...I included some
in the photoblog... http://homepage.mac.com/greg.dennett/PhotoAlbum30.html
there's the think to the whole "photo essay" The most rewarding part of
that was visiting the special needs kids, they loved the suit...after
they stopped being afraid of it...actually in most classes we went to,
some people thought it was a real bear....yeah, right...I had to skip
Law to do it, I told Haber I had to do something for the acting
department...then I went to my Law class in the Bear suit...yeah, he
knew it was me. What a good use of my time...An hour and 15 minutes of
bear action, in just a t-shirt and boxers..it wasn't that bad...what
makes the suit bad is real stage lights...you's sweat on stage in
shorts and a t-shirt....adding fur and foam doesn't make things
easier...the play is going along ok. With all the extra rehearsal I'm
getting, my lines are solid. Alex on the other hand...no...I've been
talking with other cast memembers...they say the West cast is the
better cast...while at East, we have the better brother pair and
mother, we don't have the better Prince...wait, you ask...I'm the
prince and I don't think we have a good prince....want to know why?
it's all about Chemistry...Graeme and Carrie have it, Alex and I
don't...I'm beginning to dislike Alex...she's becomming very
unprofessional...and it's making me sick...when Dennett told her the
Prince and Tove kiss at the end, she got sick and started to
complain...thank you alex, that made me feel alot better. I'm not
thrilled about kissing her, but I didn't publically display my disgust
now did I? No I didn't. She also over acts...but that's getting less
and less of a problem...It'll all be over soon....but it's getting to
the cast...we start saying lines in normal conversation...not a day
goes by when I don't say "I'll be Back, I'll be Back" or "I
swear"....actually, someone asked me if I wanted a pine cone...I began
to cry...that is one of the lines I thought would never enter
conversation...I was wrong. Katie is feeling the same way. We need this
cast party to kick, or we're having a drinking party the week after
just to make us forget the horrors that this play has brought. I really
like her, she's so nice...but nothing is ever going to happen, I'm too
much of a coward...I can take rejection, but the fear of rejection is
what scares me the most...that might not make sense...I can take
rejection once it done, but before, I cannot stand the wait or the
chance that it might happen....she's way too good for me
anyway....everyone is...but that redhair...never thought I'd go soft
for a redhead...but hey, it is odd what love makes you do, if you can
call it that...apparently I flirt with women without even knowing
it....It happened with Brittany, she was getting mixed signals....she
really liked me, but I didn't feel the same way, I had to tell her the
truth to avoid another Bender event...she's cool with it
now....Brittany that is, I'm still cold as ice to Bender, see I can be
evil! Brittany said I tend to be so insecure...yeah, that's true, I
told her it was no news to me...I've known that for years...and it's
true...so maybe you cannot love another until you love yourself...well
I can damn well try...that's going in the MSN name...I don't know, I
should make a real move with Katie...or not, I should just sit and
watch and wait for my chance, then watch it pass by like so many others
in my life...but then if I take a chance, it never works (ie Hailey) I
put St Patricks Day on the computer and it keeps comming up in the
random playlist...and smile and feel better....god bless it...Brittany
got me thinking about top 10 songs...the top three I've linked with
people...1. St Patricks Day-John Mayer...this is obviously linked to
Hailey...I still remember the taste of her neck, the softness of her
ears...the way my clammy, nervous hands felt on her stomach during that
song...It is also a Christmas song that can be played all year
round....Kevin noticed it too during a conversation we had a Seafast, I
wasn't the only one to put it on a Christmas Mix CD. It makes me feel
so happy....2 is She Will Be Loved-Maroon 5...I've somehow just
recently linked this to Katie...yeah I know, stupid...It's a song that
doesn't really fit the "Relationship" but it feels like it should... I
did that storyboard for the music video with Katie in my head...Maybe
it's the fact "I tend to get so insecure and it doesn't matter anymore"
Maybe it's because I like the rain, and I'd stand on the corner if it
would make her happy...it also sounds like that lead singer is crying
and that's what I need to do, seriously, I need to cry...I haven't done
it in so long...3 is Let her Cry- Hootie and BlowFish. I don't think
this is the actual title...seriously...but that's what it says...hmmm,
anyway, I link this to Kirstin (aka Skankasaurous....(sigh)) "I say
that I dont care, I just run my hands through her dark
hair..."obviously.."I sat back down, had a beer and felt sorry for
myself..."oh yeah...Kirstin=Grade 10=Closet Alcoholic...'She went to
the back to get to high, then I sat on the couch and cried...." I've
known her to get high as a kite every now and again...and I cried when
she tried to kill herself...the song I used to link to her was OLP's
Somewhere Out There..."I miss your purple hair, I miss the way you
taste..." yeah, I used to cry during that one, she did have purple hair
for a point, it was damn hot....but she represents the past and the man
I have become is not the man that loved her. yay! I'll break down the
full list at the end. Oh, I'm going out with Saint tomorrow...classic
dinner and movie combo..I haven't seen her for months...she's moving to
Alberta in 5 weeks and staying until September...so this is one of the
last times I'll get to see her....It's going to be good to get
grounded...I'm also building set tomorrow...I know I can't swing a
hammer, but I can paint stuff really well and it's a good bonding
experience with the rest of the cast and crew...and I get to makes
stumps with Katie...that sounds dirty, but we're using paper mache
stumps as stools...The set has a forest motif to it...so it's going to
be cool...3 hours of building stuff...I still feel like crap, I will
get into shape before grad, I can do it in 2 months and everything is
going to ok. Run in the morning, run in the spares, run after school,
weight train 4 times a week...everything will be ok...I had to format
the computer again, but this time I actually installed the Firewall and
Anti Virus in properly and it's working fine...I'm running off of WinMX
instead of Kaaza or Kaaza lite just to avoid all of the spyware...I
still don't have a CD burning program up and running, I mean I have a
burner but no software to run the burner..I've been listening the
Mayer's extended Live version of "No Such Thing" yep, that was a bad
idea...I feel like I have accomplished nothing and my entire career
life with be dependent on 2 stupid years in high school....something
reputable...yeah sure...I'm glad my parents think I'm an intellegent
person...I don't, I'm a moron in a smart person's body..figure that
out...I'm just a slacker that tries too hard...whoa, way too much
coffee...anyway I think I'm done with the Cleric bashing now...Did I
mention I hate MuffinHead even more right now? I'm even beginning to
hate the course itself....yeah, I should drop it, but then that would
show her I'm a quitter and that's not a good thing, she's not going to
get that on me, that dumb bitch, sorry....I meant stupid puta..she even
saw me in the bear suit(Thanks for telling her Ed...) it wasn't worth
it...the picture looks gay and it's not even funny...she had a prep
block! so we caught her in the hallway...I wanted to catch her and
interrupt a class and just throw it all out of whack right in ther
face...ha, take that! Mom once asked, what country is MuffinHead
from(of course she didn't use MuffinHead), I looked her right in the
eye and said Quebec...we both laughed for hours...my mom swore she was
actually spanish or something, I said no...just french...if I hear one
more spotula joke, I'm going to shoot myself in the throat(that's a
very slow and painful way to die by the way) I should get her fired as
my final act as a Grade12, god that would be so satisfying....that look
on her smug face would disapear..I've also heard she hates men...that's
why it's only Ms. Charrette and there is no ring on
that finger....ok...enough MuffinHead bashing...Omar would say there is
no such thing as too much....He's been a dumbass lately...you try to
help a friend out by lending your small bits of free time to his acting
project...come on a two page script double spaced DOES NOT take 3 hours
to shoot! We did it twice too! FSCK IT! he needs to get way more
organized....it's stupid...I wanted to talk about Post Playoff
Depression, I'm out here in Vancouver and the Canucks had a chance to
make it into the 2nd round...I was already for them to win the overtime
period after that great last second goal...a minute 04 in the Flames
score...I felt oddly hollow after, I think the entire province
did...now I hope the Canadiens win...because ABC (Anybody But
Calgary...or any Ontario team....ABO I guess...The blade guard broke on
my electric razor this morning, so I had to switch to manual for the
first time, it's a good shave, but the aftershave made me want to put
my head through the mirror...god bless alcohol in open wounds...makes
you feel like a man... It came out nicely though...ok, I think I'm
done...top 10 songs as of April 24, 2004!
1. "St. Patrick's Day" John Mayer
2. "She Will Be Loved" Maroon 5
3. "Let Her Cry" Hootie and the Blowfish
4."Shadow of Doubt" The Cash Brothers
5. "Brick-Acoustic" Ben Folds
6. "Something's Missing" John Mayer
7. "Brian Wilson" The Barenaked Ladies(Note Elana is not mad at me! she even paid me back!)
8. "Somebody Else" Bleu
9. "Bother" Cory Taylor
10."When I Fall" The Barenaked Ladies

ok, that's it, thanks

-Cleric

Mood: Happy as SHIT!!! W00T!

I dropped spanish! I know, I said I wouldn't,People say, "But Cleric, why drop it this late in the year?" Here's my answer!
I was tired of fighting her, I needed a break, I needed to be happy, I NEEDED TO BE FREE!!! I need to be able to sleep at night without the thought of a provincial I couldn't past looming over me like some dark cloud, I need to streamline my life, cut out all the bad, keep all the good....Bender, the AP exam and now the worst of them all, SPANISH! This has been three years in the making! Ever since I stepped into Muffinhead's class and realized how she was truly like, I needed to get out....but pride kept me there, courage kept me there.....but all my courage and pride is being stretched, one man only has so much...fighting with EOTS....Stupid castmembers, sick castmembers...annoying directors, endless rehearsal can tax a person beyond their mean....but I cannot break down with acting, so things must be cut to maintain sanity...one must perserve the mind or all is lost! So I'm tired of fighting up hill wars with no objective, I'm tired of pouring my heart and soul into something and getting nothing in return, so I dropped...no matter what my classmates say, no matter what anyone  else says, I stand beside my decsion...it was a waste of an hour and 15 mintues...now I have reclaimed that time for me! NO ONE ELSE!!!

ok, I'm done..wow that felt really good
So anyway, I'm in the ranting mood again...(Still can't find good copy of EC's I'm In the Mood Again...) Anyway, what's been going on with me...endless freaking rehearsals! We have about a week left until we open...May 4th is the first Matenee...which I might need to fill, as Graeme gets even sicker when he is in the bear, so Dennett wants to make sure he mends...but putting a sick man in the suit is not a good idea....that moist, warm enviroment is going to breed germs  like no ones business...so I beter spray some disenfectent in it...damn quick, I don't want to cough so hard I bleed from my face...his words, not mine...we had some major bear problems today, all of the weight was being pushed onto the forehead and neck, it's suppose to be on the shoulders....nope....after about 15 minutes with the BeaCrew, we had things...going ok...it's still going to be a bitch wear....God bless the camel pack....the actual acting is getting better though...Dennett had Carrie and Alex fight through an acting class defensive line..while singing....to get to Graeme and myself...it was the best drama game we've ever played! Alex...well, I don't want to talk about her right now...but she is getting on my nerves a bit...I mean, I understand one needs to get the experience, but at this point, she needs to have her constuctive breakdown, then rebuild...I don't think she fully understands what is expected of her...Denett did  not cas tthis play too well...but it's a little late to complain about that...it's pretty much too late to complain about anything...Oh, if I have to be a troll guard on my days "off" I'm going to kill someone! I don't want to be a fricking troll guard! NO! It's not what I do! That's what the Ensemble is for! I can't get mad at them...all those little kids working their asses off for what? nothing! then again, I'm working my ass off for nothing too...oh well, it's good to have company...I'm preping for the tech weekend...bringing all my CD's, discmen, camelpak...food, lots and lots of food...I'm suprized were not sleeping over there, it would be more efficent. or not..we all wake up tired, in pain and grumpy...then rehearsing? no...not a good idea....What else? I'm still trying to figure out Grad tables...Shawn and I think we have it figured out...oh yeah, about that....Shawn wants to go to war with Tony....jeeze...that's the  last thing we need...a "gang" war....yes, it's in quotes....we are not a gang...we're just 5 guys with who we hope, one guy can call a whole bunch of guys..and Tony...he's the same...expect he's not delousioned...Anyway,  I can't bad mouth my crew....but Shawn....I really hope he cleans up his act...the lying has to stop...I can't keep it straight, neither can he....that's why we know he lies..when he tells Omar, Mramor, Sohota and myself four different version of the same story...one gets to thinking...anyway, not in that big of a ranty mood...But one good thing about all this stress? I slept like a baby last night...about 7pm to 6am...I haven't done that since I was like 3...it was bliss...see...dropping spanish was a good thing.., ok I'm gone

Thank

-Cleric

"I don't want to lie about it, I'm not bulletproof"

Mood: Happy/Sad/Stressed

Hey all!
I'm stressed out from all the things swirling around in my life....Cold War test in the morning...Rehearsal ALL DAY for the next 3 days...WE OPEN TUEDAY!!!! ...I had one of the WORSE rehearsals ever! We had half a bear suit(wait until I get the pic) Alex is being her chipper self(Sarcasum intended) and I was just tired...I yelled at my mom over the phone...she got pissed off...I felt bad....I apolgized a lot ...I'm still trying to figure out a Grad Table arrangement...I can't organized 10 guys and their parents... but I went to my old writing.com porfolio and found this little poem still on my message board...I wrote this a few months ago, it made me feel a bit better

Warm stomach, clammy hands, I am calm
A sweet possesion has come over me
Giving me skills I never knew I had
The romantic locked inside the nerd
a natural, flowing instinct
St. Patricks Day on Valentines day
whipering the lines in her ear
the sweetest of it all
6 hours look like 6 months
Walked home in the rain, suit jacket still wet
the smell of 2nd hand pot, perfume and vancouver rain
I know it won't work
for the first time I don't care
The failure of all the other dates brought me there
Love is what it is for a second
as long as you hold on it, love is always there
it doesn't need to continue, just exsist
in the past

Anyway, that made my day...I was going to watch "Chicago" (Under Brittany's orders) but I just didnt'...who has the time to sit down and watch a movie anyway? Too bad she has already seen "Fight Club" I should make her read the book...my tattered dog eared copy...oh, it's Pyro's birthday today....the little fscker is 14...I didn't think he'd live that long...I didn't think I'D live that long...anyway...Happy Birthday Hermano, you're surprizing me everyday, you might turn out to be a decent person after all...I'm proud...heh ,I'm glad he'll never read that...Here's a few things
Website of the Week: www.2flashgames.com
I highly recommend the "Punk-O-Matic" and "Madness Interactive!" It's the best site to waste your time on!
Weapon of the Week: The HK G36K MWS(Modular Weapon System)
this is basically the poorman's version of the Xm8...you take a basic rifle reciever then you add the various components to change the weapon for different missions...it can be a basic carbine...add a longer barrel, change the scope, add a bi-pod, you know  have a Designated Marksmen Rifle...add a 100 round beta mag, you have a light machine gun...use the super short barrel, 2 port handguard and the Mp5K style buttcap you have a SMG style weapon...it's ingenious!  I know it's real, but I made it a little better....ok, that's it, I'm gone

-Cleric