Mood: Ok

Well, techinically, next week is not the last week...but with the psych final, Crim Stat final, Psych paper, research proposal and mock trial all next week...anything else will be easy...the only other two things would be the Socio/Crim law finales which are within the exam schedule.

Break Down
Monday-Psych paper/exam
Wenesday-Crim Stat exam/Mock trial
Thursday-Creative Writing reading
Friday-Crim Stat research proposal due
April 13th-Sociology Exam
April 20th-Crim Law Exam

Then I am off until summer semester starts, but I'm only taking Comp Sci...giving me more time to work on other things...work, my health...etc...maybe even a writing project...

Yesterday(being Thursday) it was raining..and of course, I always feel better in the rain...but I had neglected to get my umbrella back from saint the night I lent it to her...so let's just say the way home was a little soggy...I didn't mind that much...

I always seem to put together scenes in my head as I'm waiting at the bus stop...and yes, maybe my fasination with "amy" is a little pointless...I guess she's something I've never really known before...fine artsy...just something about her...I'll leave it at that...even though I don't want to
Edit: remember I said I thought she looked like Amy Lee? I changed my mind on that one...Dead ringer for Amy Acker of Angel fame...weird...

The end of this semster will be alot the end of the last one...mad scramble to the end, then a week between finales...it's going to be nice. I could get some running done...I picked up a Nike running shirt at a great price today...I've been meaning to get one for years.

Jamie and I looked at CDs today...made me think about that Nirvana Boxset on the shelf...I said I'll give it until november, if nothing happens by then, I'l keep it...Jamie used his Future Shop card and got Metallica's master of puppets and the new Theory of a Deadman album...

Other than that, I'm just working through the weekend and I'm hoping for a good trial on wenesday...

Done...

-Cleric

Mood: ok

Well...Psych paper is due monday, so to save myself the time in the morning, I'm trying to get the lit review done now...only to have to do a lit review for Crim Stat before friday...I put the pro in procrastination anyway...I always get it done...there was one exception this term, but I more than made up for it with a 11/15 law paper...I hate it when a paper isn't worth anything...15% isn't worth anything...20 or more is worth the time it takes to research and write a paper. Now 1107-30%...yeah, that was a paper. I was proud of that one, 77% from a hardass prof...Speaking of law, I'm still dreading my mock trial on wenesday...I'll be the only Single Crown to loose...even though I had no idea how the other one won her case...I couldn't see the judge's logic pattern in handing down a conviction...I was told some lawyers argue cases law, others argue fact. I fall into the second category for this project....I just hope I can be a good orator and be pervasive...

Daylight saving time kills me...I can't loose an hour...I'm going to be ever more sleep deprived going into the Crunch Week.  Looks like a lot more Vanilla Lattes for me then...a got a coffee monkey on my back...stupid monkey...it could be worse. I could be smoking...or doing crack cocaine...

Have I become more boring with this optimism kick? I just seem like I've lost a little edge...

When I do sleep, my dreams seem to become more vivid and fragmented. My theory that I've been spreading about for dream interpretation isn't really working. I learned a few more last week in psych and they aren't able to explain my dreams....but I really think that if I got more sleep, I'd be even more productive...if I can carry a full course load and maintain a good GPA with only say, 4 hours of sleep a night...imagine if I'd get the recommended 10...I'd be a god or something of the like...(delusions of grandeur?)

I talked to Jenny...last night? Anyway, it seemed weird and distance...but not retarded...I've gotten over that hurdle. There's something...nothing I can objectively quantify, but it's there...must be more proactive...seriously, it's starting to piss me off.....(just starting? yeah, right)

I must really write down my ideas when I'm at the busstop at 10pm...seriously, I had this great thing building on thursdays and I swore I would remember it when I got home, but when I begun to type it, it didn't seem right...too bad...I had an interesting emotional like "tripping" thing that would have made good poetry. Damn that "amy"...fricking intriguing...(intriguing when wet?)

What is with this comments at the end? the first two were by accident, but the last one seemed intentional...fficeffice" />

Gwha, I have a kink in my neck...torture...I might have sat on the couch funny...You know what? I'm going to pack it in for the night. Tomorrow, I will adjust to the time change and tackle it again. I can do most papers in 6 hours...Research proposals don't count...that one is going to take a couple days...eek...

done...

-Cleric

Mood: Ok

I always try to leave an hour a page...it's worked 9/10...yay for me...I found This in my stat page...if you combine both the worst and the best list, you get my musical taste...so what does that say? He came out swinging against:

John Mayer(saying Daughters was "pretentious as fuck)and the Gin Blossoms(Found Out About had "Serious Gonad Deficiency"), Matchbox("Even Rednecks think these guys are rednecks"), Vertical Horizon("Vh1 lackeys), The Beastie Boys("New Kids with a Shticks")and Nirvana("Plagiarists who took the 80's by the Killing Joke and called it "Come as You Are")...

that's a pretty bold statement

go to the other list and he praises BNL(Lovers in a Dangerous Time), U2(Everything from the Joshua Tree), Beatles(Everything Period) and the Allman Brothers(Melissa)...Coldplay(One I Love)

So I don't know where to stand on this one. No idea how it gets to be an external link to here either...hmmmm...no wonder this guy doesn't post an email address...the hate mail would cause his comp to implode(yes that's what I said…big ol’ black hole to suck him in)...At least Maroon 5 isn't up on either of them...why do I diss Maroon 5? I like em'...they're just quintessential pop…and that's not necessarily a bad thing...

So the psych paper goes well, sleep will become optional and I'll have this sucker wrapped up before 6...maybe I'll get 5 hours before sociology(I should sleep in through it or sleep during it)...I'm not worried about the psych exam as it's worth a sad 10%....tuesday will be spent primary on Crim Stat...I don't want to touch my case until Crim Law starts...I'm beating myself over the head for a sad 10%...I'll probably get called for breach of procedure or something...fucking hell...I should ask if you get better marks if you win...stupid judge...

No, no...I said I wouldn't beat myself up about it...yeah, I'm done...back to work!

-Cleric

fficeffice" /> 

Mood: Tired but ok...

Another sucessful allnighter...this time without the aid of caffiene. I just drank water. Lots and lots of water. It worked. Ok, so what if as I went to bed(at 7:45am) I was reportedly mummbling about monkey castles and the Truce at Bakura(Star Wars thing) and the Katana fleet  I'm fine, seriously.

I just want to put an allnighter entry on the day of it...I'll head home later on and put something else up once "midnight" hits...I got some good stuff from sociology and I figured out that Thursday poetry block...

-Cleric

Mood: ok, but stressedfficeffice" />

Augh, I got some viral spy engine attached to the blog and every enty I submitted would have this search bar thing installed in it...fuck, it pissed me off. So what to say? We're back at pretty much staus quo. I still have to install Itunes, Quicktax and Jamie's RO stuff. No biggie, I'll be done before 4.

Ok, so it appears today that sociology is even more depressing than I thought it was. We watched two movies today. The first one, I liked. It was about the War Against the War on Drugs as it said that the Regan initiated war on drugs turned what was a purely medical problem of drug addiction into a crime. I found it interesting that LEO(Law Enforcement Officers) have to find a need to justify their existence. Think about this, LEOs can't get rid of crime completely as they would have no jobs, but they have to say they are "winning" the war on crime(and drugs).

The other film, ugh...was about the Coca Cola empire...which just pisses me off. They want to be the most consumed beverage in the world. Even above water (which we need to live!) and tea which is deeply rooted in so many cultures. That's just stupid. I thought that all these corporations make me sick and they're propaganda is just outrages, but I have to stop and think about it for a second
I'm a Coffee (Starbucks) Whore and they're taking over the world too...so yes, that was a hypocritical moment. Speaking of coffee, I got one before socio...I really should have had breakfast first...Due to circumstances outside of my control, I finished the psych final in 30 mins...and I had to...um...go...

It dawned on me today...the Crim Stat final on wenesday is worth 30%...so is the Project and I can't find the project instruction sheet...so I'm going to use the book and my notes and try to pull out 10-12 pages double space. Best of luck to me!

What I don't get, I've done at least 3 weeks of legal research and prep for the mock trial, worth a measly 10%, yet when it comes to the Crim stat project, I've probably done a grand total of an hour of work so far. Meaning wenesday/thursday night is going to be stressful. I'm thinking of blowing off psych as I need the time to rest. We're not doing anything big anyway. I want to go to the final CRWR class as I really enjoy that class for several reasons.

My much needed day of rest has turned into a tech support nightmare from hell. But I'm managing. This is only my second major Crunch Week(not including the "month" for high school finales) I found it easier last year, of course because those were all first year courses. Maybe second year courses aren't as easy I had first thought. ok, 1207/1208 aren't really second years are those are designated with a 2(ie 2330)...but they are a little harder. It's in the weighting. Crim Stat, ugh...2 assignments are 30, the first test was 20 and there's 10% participation...yes, I know that doesn't add up, but I don't care. All I'm saying that is 60% of the marks are coming in the next week, hell the next 3 days! That's stupid. I'm getting a little apprehensive about passing it...but remember, any course I thought I was going to fail, I didn't...the only course I was sure I was going to pass (comp sci) I didn't get high enough for prereq...so yeah...my grades for this semester should be a little more balanced...no A's, but a lot of B's and I can handle that. I have to start worrying about my GPA after all.

(this isn't really poetry, but bare with me here)
Sad eyes of brown, deep in contemplative though. Dark and mournful, yet always bright.
Sparking Blue eyes shine with energy unseen. Can see deep into a man
Mysterious Green eyes always keep you thinking.

I don't know, that came out better somewhere else...anyway, I'm done. I have more things to install...

-Cleric

Mood: stressed

I went to bed at 11:30 and I haven't been able to fall asleep since. I'm really worried about everything that's happening tomorrow. I shouldn't be...I should be fine for it all...oh well...I'm either going to stick out the next three hours and then "get up" or try to gets fleeting amounts of sleep. Which ever happens, I'm still going to need a coffee to survive Crim Stats and probably one later to survive Crim Law...I only have two on wenesdays. I really shouldn't anyway. Coffee Monkey

I realized something today, I have a "Them vs Me" mentality much as the LEOs develop an Us vs Them one (The Thin Blue Line)...now, this isn't something I've developed from learning about the thin blue line, all throughout high school I pretty much maintained this. It hadn't done me any good and I think I should stop.

This also came to me today, don't ask me how...Big Bird (From Sesame Street) had a teddy bear named Radar...now back when I was 3, I wouldn't have recognized that bear...but if you think about it had an uncanny resemblance to the one Walter "Radar" O' Reilly had in MASH...coincidence? I think not...so it is weird for Big Bird to own something that symbolizes "childhood" lost during a war?(as Hawkeye put it, it was a symbol for all the boys that came to Korea and left men)  I don't know...I can't believe I'm this stressed yet I have the time to think about this...ugh..fficeffice" />

So I think I'm going to try to sleep...I need to shave in the morning...haven't shaved in a week...of course, that means nothing to me...I can't grow anything...

 Edit(6:31): Didn't sleep...but I feel even worse as it's a miracle that my suit fits(barely)...I think the SHREAD program is going to have to be alot harder and start sooner...

-Cleric

Mood: ---

Well, so I haven't slept yet...I blew through the Crim Stat final like a standard mag in a Glock 18C(Yes, that's fast)...I have one rule, I stay an hour...at one point, staring at the page will not help anymore than it has to. I thought about asking for a second project sheet, but then that would be admitting my mega procrastination...and Thompson would have my chunky ass...so I'm going to ball through the notes and pull out a relevant section...and maybe a very long Lit Review will allow me to hit the 10 2x spaced limit...here's hoping...I'm already making plans to retake this course...and that's rough! I don't think any of the Crims I'm taking in the fall require this, they just require the ones I've already done...so that's good...but I don't want to fail(or fail to prereq)...but if I have to, I can learn from my mistakes...

Non-Fat lattes suck...but are an integral part of the S.H.R.E.A.D program...which is coming into its own(after the catchy acronym)...more on that when it comes...fficeffice" />

I'm ready to curl up in a ball and cry, but I can't do that until friday afternoon...I can't do anything until friday afternoon...I'm going to show up to Crim Stat in sweats, runners and glasses, plunk down another shitty project on her desk and go home...and pass out...until the beginning of May...or whenever Comp Sci Round II starts...fuck me... at least it's twice a week...and not that 3 hour hell on earth...if I had the means, I would have torn my own spleen out just to past the boredom....

Intimacy, that's all I'm asking for, another warm soft body to cuddle up with for a while...I'm this close to filling out a personal ad: Intelligent SWM Crim Major Seeks SWF Social Major brunette for dating and other...(why do I put so much stock in a major? Maybe because I have one)ha, that would be retarded as sin...but isn't that what we all seek(if we don't already have it) just a little warmth and love? The summer is going to be too cold for me anyway...
Again, I hate being a romantic with no one to romantic to...I was meaning to write that earlier...why did I just remember it now?

soon, I will have been up for 24 hours...something I haven't done in a while. Sometimes no sleep is better than 2 hours...I could not settle last night. I used every single method I knew short of drugs...most have been effective, but last night nothing worked...I hope I can get some rest tonight or at least get working on the Crim Stat project...I think it should be against regs to put 60% of the course before the exam schedule starts...but no ombudsman in the world would help me fight that one...Rideout once said an exam worth more than 10% after a certain date was invalid...I don't know...I don't really feel like arguing it anyway...funny, you think I'd be more distraught with 2 Grandparents dying in 4 months...but no personal issues will get me out of this...

The bags under my eyes are black as coal now...I hope that'll go away...as the one that were just black never did...I'm feeling pretty low right now...I think it's the fatigue anyway...not me itself...but fighting a war with my pants this morning didn't help. I think back on it and laugh, when I first got it, I said I didn't need it wider as I quote "Wouldn't gain weight"...that was fresh off my summer training tour where I was a tank...now? I'm like a big squishy MRE kit(to stay within the military analogy) I'm not even that funny kind of tired...where I'm all random and giddy...I'm just pissed off...like uber angry...I just want to go home...but I can't until 6:40pm today...fuck.............

I should skip socio, go home...nap, grab my camera and come back...but if I fall asleep I'm afraid I won't wake up(in time for law)...is there a phobia of dying in your sleep?...hmmm, I have to look that one up...DSM-IV it or something(Clinophobia-fear of going to bed? close)....well wait...if I catch the 9:54 home...I'll have from 10-3:25 to rest...but then I'd have to change...which I don't think I can do(sigh)...sheer luck why I'm in these pants right now...I can't stress that enough and how much that pisses me off...

Back to this phobia thing...Hypophobia is the fear of sleep...still close...but no cigar...Somniphobia is also fear of sleep...nothing...I guess it's the fear of not waking up...is that a fear of dying? Thanatophobia is the fear of dying...gwah...see, now I'm being random...just like that's Murphy’s law bit last year...I had Pediculophobia a while ago...stupid Jamie and his long hair...look that one up...

ugh, 2 hours until Sociology...I just want to go and sleep...sleep...sleep...sleep...
Next story I'm writing, the protag is going to have Somniphobia...and being a badass Maverick Crown Prosecutor...yeah...he had it because of Fight Club or something...ok, I'm going to go find something else to do or a place to sleep, whichever comes first...

-Cleric

Mood: ok

I'm going to bed in an hour. I have a nice chunk of Crim Stat done and I'm going to draw the survery up during some free time tomorrow. It's not a great project, but that's a good sign...

In reference to the title...I lost my case this afternoon, as expected. It did take the judge 20 minutes to decide (most took 5-10) meaning I did raise some points that stuck. It was lack of case law to back up my points that cost me the case. Horner said later on that my grandstanding was excellent. I think I was the only one to really put on a show. She also explained that it's a good technique to grandstand a bad case and confuse the judge. I was nervous as hell though, my left leg shook like a paxil addict. I feel good though despite that fact I lost. I got home and got to bed around 8pm. I got back up at 11 to start the project. God this pattern has to stop though, it can't be healthy for me.

Wow, I'm really writing in this Crim Stat project. I thought I wouldn't have enough to pull 10-12 pages 2x spaced. Meaning I can do a mini lit review and not like the slaughter POS I wrote for psych. I got 61% on the "final"...not very good even though the test only counted fot 10%...Once I get the Crim stat project done, I'm free...I'm not worried about my other 2 finals in Socio/Crim law...the Crim Law one is in a week which will give me plenty of time to study. Sociology was pretty cool today(for the part I was awake for) Culture in TV...

I'm a little depressed now...but again, that's due to the stress and tiredness...I'm going to finish up the RPE paragraph and go to bed...night

-Cleric